Is perspective killing your progress?

Dude! Can I call you dude? How do you view yourself today? Your life? Your career? Your marriage? The choices you’ve made? Although I have made some serious progress in the area of positive mindset and perspective, I still have a long way to go, baby! My mind, just like my family, my marriage, my health and my career are all works in progress. For my first blog post I want to talk about perspective and how it can help move you forward or hold you back.

So listen, I’m just gonna cut to the chase. I judge myself and my past so harshly that I would never be friends with someone like me. I am a mean girl to myself. I’m kind to others and go out of my way to be helpful but inside, I am a freaking mean girl who just needs to be put in her place. I’m a 40 year old woman who is working tirelessly and fearlessly to curb this awful, lifelong embedded habit.

So here’s my current mean girl perspective that I’m working on right now. And the very fact that I’m writing this blog post is a HUGE (I mean gigantic) step in the right direction. My current mean girl tells me that I’m a joke when it comes to any kind of a career; writing or otherwise. I mean, I have a bachelor’s degree in mass communications (and still have the student loan bill to prove it), I should have some kind of longevity in that career field, right? I should be able to firmly state what I “do” when the question comes up, right? I should have a bigger 401k, right? I’m mother#ucking 40, I should be seeing my financial advisor on a regular basis, right? The fact that none of that is true for me, equals being a failure, a laughing stock, a poor drifting soul. At least that’s the kind of BS my mean girl perspective tries to spoon feed me. UHG I hate her.

I think my mean girl persists because of my past. I know, I know that’s a big fat surprise. Due to the fact that I so royally effed up in my 20’s and got myself addicted to drugs and alcohol and hit my rock bottom firmly on my desperate booty, I think she has something to prove. I think it also has to do with the fact that my parents and their generation had longevity in their careers. My dad was a very successful electrician and owned his own business. My mom worked diligently in the medical field in various positions and then became a social worker. I, on the other hand, have worked in the mortgage, financial planning, for the military and in the mental health fields. And now I’m toggling between health and fitness as a network marketer and aspiring writer. Oh and there’s more! In between all of that, I studied for my real estate license, tried a network marketing business for a solid minute and started an organizing business with a blog.

My mean girl tells me I’m just a lost soul who should be further in this life. She tells me that a second blog is a road I’m not worthy of traveling. She tells me I need to just stick to one thing despite not finding happiness with it.

Let me tell you I am bitch slapping that perspective and my mean girl with this post and the advent of my blog site! My path is my own. My path is full of beautiful turns and unexpected adventures. I mean, what’s more adventurous than the financial field for someone who needed a math tutor for pre-math in college? Am I right?! What’s more beautiful than two amazing children and a supportive husband? What’s more amazing that 82 chickens, 9 turkeys, 3 alpacas, 3 goats and 4 cats? What’s more beautiful than peace and quiet in the country? What’s more beautiful than finding your voice after hiding behind a façade for 15 years? What’s more beautiful than being a PTO mom and my own boss? All of these things are NOT how I envisioned my life. There was not one second where I thought I was ever worthy of this kind of life. I'm grateful everyday that God sees fit that I have this beautiful, messy life.

Today, this is the perspective I choose to have. Not the skewed perception of what the “broken” me had. The “broken” me BTW is the one who battled with addictions (more on that in other posts). The “broken” me had something to prove. Was insecure. Was bruised. The “inspired messy” me is thankful. Is humbled. Is in awe of the blessings all around. Is inspired by the simple everyday things that this life offers. The “inspired mess” me doesn’t have to force things. She is accepting.

God has a way of giving us exactly what we need at exactly the right time. Although I never dreamed of this life I have today, it’s perfect. Listen, I am not an optimist at heart. I have to be intentional about my perspective, about looking for the good, about loving me for who I was and who I have become. How the heck do I do that?

The Miracle Morning, my friends, The Miracle Morning by Hal Elrod. This book has changed my life. Ever since getting past my drug and alcohol addiction, I have known that gratitude and prayer are two huge keys to moving forward. Those two things I have practiced for many years, but the Miracle Morning brought structure, direction and routine to those things. It also added a few other really important components such as meditation, affirmations and visualization. Every morning I take about 30 minutes to sit in silence, gratitude journal, write affirmations, visualize and meditate.

Perspective. Are you intentional about your perspective? About your happiness? About you? Are you paying more attention to your mean girl perspective or your inspired perspective? So here’s to continuing to follow the path that I never planned for but fits me perfectly. Here’s to moving forward bravely no matter where it takes me!

#perspective #mindset